All Things End
June 25, 2003 - 2:01 am
The past few weeks I have been mentally consumed with a dilema. You see, the very next day after I got back from home, I got called into my boss's office. I figured he wanted to have a career chat, since Lara had been trying to set that up for me. Well it turns out that the company was making budget cuts, and unfortunately, the intern pay was one of the cuts. So, in other words, I wasn't going to get paid anymore. Everyone already knew, and no one really wanted me to leave. They were going to pay me until the end of June. So, basically, I panicked. I'd went through so much trouble to be in New York for the summer. Back in the beginning, it was crucial that I be in the city because Bart and I were planning on getting an apartment together. Well, that plan got ruined in just about everyway possible. However, I'd already bought my plane ticket to return to New York from London instead of returning home. It took a lot to round up the money to pay for summer housing (kind of stressful and guilt-inducing).
I tried really hard to find a job, because if I was going to stay in the city, then I needed a job. There's no question about that. I had a few interviews and heard back from most places. However, I found myself not taking the job search seriously. In the back of my mind, I really wanted to go home. However, I still didn't know what to do. I'd already moved into my room (the same room that I'll have all of next year), I had already fully paid my housing for the whole summer, and I had a few good job leads. Both options (home or NYC) were pretty equal. So, I decided to make a pro/con list for each option. That didn't help at all. NYC had like 2 pros and 2 cons, while home had a bunch of pros and a bunch of cons. I just couldn't make up my mind. It was the only thing I was thinking about for the longest time. One night in particular when I was contemplating what I should do, this Mastercard commercial came on. It had a series of events that cost money, then the last one was "THE COMFORTS OF HOME...PRICELESS." It was just really weird because it was like a sign or something. Then later that night I saw a billboard ad in the city that said "THE BEST KITCHEN TABLE IS ONE OCCUPIED BY YOUR FAMILY." Oddly enough, those weren't enough to make me just say, 'ok, I'm going home.'
I think the real decision maker came when my grandma (person whom I am EXTREMELY EXTREMELY close to) got really sick and had to be rushed to the emergency room. She was in so much pain that she was hallucinating. It turned out to be a kidney stone lodged (somewhere?), and she had to stay in the hospital for about 3 or 4 days. It really killed me that I wasn't there. She hasn't really been in the best condition anyways. Her knees have been giving her problems for the longest time, and I know that deep down, I should be spending as much time with her as I can. Well, that goes for all of my family, but especially my grandma because I need to accept that she's getting older. She's still relatively young for being the grandma of an almost 22 year old (she's 61, she won't mind me saying that), but still, every minute is precious.
So, yes, I'm going home for the rest of the summer. I'm leaving New York on June 28th. I really can't wait to tell you the truth. I contacted Joe at my old job (GEAR For Sports), and I think I've got a job lined up.
I moved my stuff to storage today, with the help of my very kind friend, Stan and his grandpa. It took 3 trips to and from storage, but we finally got it all there. I hate that part of moving, HATE it, but the help from Stan made it a lot easier.
I haven't really been too busy the past few weeks. I met up with Lisa and Jason a few days ago. Jason and I talked about the car deal that he wants to do. That boy is such a business man. He jumps at every opportunity to make a quick buck. I swear, he'll be a millionaire by the time he's 25. No joke. Lisa is trying to get into acting and singing. I had no idea she was interested in that. She has a really good voice, so I hope sometime comes of it.
Sara called me and we met up for coffee. It was really nice getting to see her. She just got back from her trip around Europe. It sounded amazing. She got me this little, glass duck from Italy. It's SO cute. I was blown away that she thought of me. It was super sweet.
About a week ago I went to Lara's comedy show at Gotham. I invited Asha along. We had fun, but Asha left before the show was over and I was stuck there all by myself with a really expensive bill. It really hurt my feelings that she would leave like that. You shouldn't make plans with someone unless you can committ the time. Another crime Asha has committed: we made plans to see a movie together on Saturday. Well she called and cancelled (typical of her, I was actually expecting her to cancel). We rescheduled for Sunday. Well, she called again and cancelled. I was very angry. She does this all the time, and I don't want to put up with it anymore. I told her how I felt and she just didn't understand, which is so stupid. Anyways, on to other topics...
I have failed to write about something that is SUPER dear to my heart. My beloved tv show, 'Dawson's Creek', ended while I was in London. My wonderful mom taped every episode for me and for the first few days of the summer I did nothing but watch episodes of DC back to back. I was crying so much. Then, the final episode was watched. It was a very emotional 2 hours for me. I cried non-stop throughout the entire time (I'm not exaggerating either). I was so worried that it was going to end badly or in a way I didn't like. The ending was absolutely perfect. One of the main characters dies, but still. A character usually dies when a series ends. If you haven't seen the finale yet, and you don't want it to be spoiled, then don't read the end of this paragraph. Ok, so Jenn is the one who dies. Yeah, and when she takes her last gasp and passes on (sniffle), Grams wakes up and realizes that Jenn has died. She starts to say her goodbye, and then...my recorded tape stops and cuts off the show. Yes, my mother, in all of her infinite wisdom of recording things off the tv for me, failed to realize that there wasn't enough tape left to get the entire final episode. When that happened I felt like someone had slapped me. I was in the middle of a major bawling fit, then it just stopped. I immediately called my mom, and 'calmly' requested her to explain how she could let something like that to happen. Of all the nerve! Well, I put in the other tape and finished my (best in the whole world) show. Joey finally put an end to the whole triangle that's been going on throughout the entire show. She picked the right man, and I seriously lost it when I realized that it was Pacey. I was completely and totally prepared for it to be Dawson. There wasn't a doubt in my mind that it would end that way. This last show was so completely perfect. More perfect than I could ever describe in words. Now that it's over, I honestly feel like something is missing. I just do not want to accept the fact that there will not be any more episodes. No, no, no!!!
I can't think of anything else to talk about. Oh, I've seen quite a few movies recently. I'll give you a run-down: "From Justin to Kelly" (totally cheesy, 'Grease'-wanna-be, "The Eye" (great, GREAT thriller), "Dumb and Dumberer" (very stupid), "Hollywood Homicide" (pretty funny, Josh Hartnett is SOOOOOO hot), hmmmm, what else....that's all I can think of for now.
I'll probably be home by the time I write something new. So, see some of you soon!
Oh, Monday was Duane's 36th Birthday....Happy Birthday, Duaney!!!
